A glimpse into the life of a multigenerational and blended family.
1 Baby Boomer, 2 Generation Xers, 1 Millennial, 1 Generation Z
stepmother [ˈstɛpˌmʌðə] n: a woman who has married one’s father after the death or divorce of one’s mother
Collins English Dictionary – Complete and Unabridged © HarperCollins Publishers 1991, 1994, 1998, 2000, 2003
August 1999, I officially took on this new title and role as “Stepmother”. My stepchildren were young adults, 18 and 22, and I was a young 27 year old bride.
When I think back, I remember telling my college roommates that I would never date, let alone, marry some one with this type of baggage! But somehow I found myself dating my distinguished husband for four years clearly aware of what was waiting for me in this new life! Most people would have probably run, if not sprinted, away from a situation like this. But, in hindsight, while it had its challenges it was satisfying and rewarding. I’m talking about my relationship with my stepchildren. It was easy for us to get along, I believe, because I could relate to them and what they were going through at this stage of their lives. Also, I never tried to take on the role of their mother.
I must give some credit to my husband and my stepchildren. I’m sure it was difficult for them to accept me into their family, too. As young adults growing up with their father not only dating, but a much younger women at the time must have taken a lot of maturity. A lot nosy people would ask questions about how we all got along. We could honestly answer fine! I know that was not the answer that they were expecting but it was the truth. Over the years, both of my stepchildren have shared their stories, thoughts, and jokes about our relationship and our family.
So let’s fast forward to September 2011, our Stepfamily is truly a Blended Family, now! My husband and I had a beautiful little girl two years ago and her big brother and sister truly adore her! With that my daughter and I are in the planning stages for a baby shower for her big sister!
So take a brief moment to envision this family portrait – my distinguished husband; me the young wife; my stepson and his wife; my stepdaughter (expecting in November) and her husband;, and our little girl! So over the last past 12 years we have cried, laughed, lived and loved as one family! We’ve never considered anything about our relationship as a “step” anything!
Happy National Stepfamily Day!
-Lora, a (Step)Mother